A Special Dog Called Jessie

Jessie - Forever in my Heart, 11" x 14", acrylic

Blog 5


Maybe, you have wondered about the dog featured on my website, blog and Facebook page. Who is this dog?


After moving to Canada and into our first house, I felt very alone and homesick. I lived in a new country far away from my family and friends. I felt shy about speaking English and could not work as I still waited to become a permanent resident.


For decades, I had suffered from a severe animal phobia. This anxiety was so bad I was afraid to leave our house because of the many dogs in the neighbourhood. My husband and I decided that we had to adopt a dog to help me overcome the phobia. The Humane Society advised us to get a puppy so that I could get used to a slowly growing dog. We encountered three cute puppies at the breeder's house. We were smitten with one little girl and took her home the same evening.


Jessie did help me to get over my fear. However, it did not happen overnight. During the first couple of weeks, I was often afraid of her and called my husband for encouragement. However, she was a very clever girl who loved to please. Ingo and I spent a lot of time training her, which also helped me. She developed into a fantastic dog.


When Jessie died due to cancer on October 30, 2005, the day after her 10th birthday, I was heartbroken. She was my constant companion through many hard times while I tried to get settled in a new country far away from my family and friends. She also opened my world to so much pleasure and the unconditional love of dogs.


So why is Jessie, our Golden Retriever, still the feature of my business? Three months after her death, after we had adopted a new Golden Retriever called Candy, I felt the urge to start a portrait of our beloved Jessie. I used a photo taken on her last birthday as my reference. I wanted to make sure that I would not forget her. Painting Jessie was very emotional as my grief was still raw. I started a portrait of my daughter when the pain was too overwhelming to continue painting.


I registered both paintings for a juried exhibition. When the organizers informed me that my dog portrait had won an award for its expressiveness, I was exhilarated, proud, and moved to tears. Both paintings had received high marks for execution and artistic skills. I was very touched that my works of love had also moved the jurors. The news encouraged me to take my passion for painting past the hobby stage. I started to paint regularly, joined fellow painters for outings and participated in exhibitions. After years of dedication to my roles of wife and mother, I found a passion that made me feel like myself.


Lately, I have created only a few animal portraits, even though they always bring me immense joy. I only felted the occasional painting of our beloved pets. However, I spent hundreds of hours felting the three-dimensional miniature version of our beloved Australian Shepherd, Alex. This year, I feel like creating more felted animal paintings again, especially as it is time to capture our new puppy, Shadow. Painting him will be an extra challenge because he is almost completely black. The project excites me because every challenge is a chance to grow.


What have you attempted that brought you out of your comfort zone?

25 Years in Canada

 

Jessie - Forever in my Heart, acrylic, 16" x 20"

Blog 1 

 

2006 was our year of the dogs. On Friday, January 13, we were on our way home after returning from Germany. Suddenly, we received a call from the Humane Society to let us know that they had a fourteen-month-old Golden Retriever named Coco for us. We were ecstatic and decided to drive by right away. I told Dominic and Christine that Coco might not be the right dog for us and that it could be a while before we found our new companion. While I directed the talk to my children, it was as much relevant for myself. The closer we got, the more nervous I got. What can I say, we adopted Coco right away. She was darker than Jessie. She was a beautiful caramel colour with a bulkier build and a shorter snout.

From the beginning, Candy had health problems. First, she got sick with diarrhea and vomiting. What was very worrisome was that she had lost almost 5 kg within three weeks. I was so scared. Luckily, after a couple of days, Candy was back to normal. She either ate something that did not agree with her or was stressed about her change of environment. Next, Candy had a reaction to the anesthesia when she was spayed and needed an IV. But it got even worse in the summer when she had wolfed down three wooden game figures of 10cm in height. The ultrasound did not show any foreign objects, but the vet cautioned that wood and certain plastics were not visible. He was right. Candy needed an emergency operation.

At the end of January, I started the portrait of our beloved Jessie from a photo taken on her last birthday. It was the day before she died. While I worked on the painting during studio time with the Blackburn Hamlet Arts Group, I felt good and proud of all the compliments our beautiful dog got. Once I was in my car, the tears came back. Candy was a lovely dog, but not able to fill the hole Jessie had left.

Princess Christine, acrylic, 14" x 11"

Painting Jessie was very emotional. I started a portrait of Christine, my daughter when the pain was too overwhelming to continue painting. Even a look at the finished painting, brought out the rawness of my grief.

Christine’s portrait was also not without challenges. I was not happy with the face until I realized that it was too long. Even though many people had told me that Christine was the spitting image of myself, I disagreed. Therefore, it was interesting to see that I felt like looking into my face at one point.

I registered both paintings, “Princess Christine” and “Jessie - Forever in my Heart” for the juried Arteast Budding Artist Exhibition. When the organizer informed me that my dog portrait had won an award for its expressiveness, I was exhilarated, proud, and so emotional that I cried some tears. Both paintings had received high marks for execution and artistic skills. I was very touched that my work of love had also moved the jurors. The news encouraged me to take my passion for painting past the hobby stage. I considered concentrating on pet portraits even though nobody in my family supported my vision.

The summer was busy with lots of activities and the visit from one of my friends and her family, a four-week stay of a Spanish exchange student, and the fostering of eight-month-old Beagle Frankie. After Jessie had died, we had applied as foster parents for BARK (Bytown Association for Rescued Kanines (B.A.R.K.) Dog Rescue. Even though we had already adopted Candy, we felt we should still foster a couple of dogs. Frankie came in mid-July and was such a fun dog. He was much smaller than Candy but believed he was the ruler of the pack. He stayed with us until Candy needed her emergency operation.

On September 19, our life got even abundant when I picked up a seventeen-month-old Australian Shepherd called Alex. He had spent his young life in a cage in his owner’s garage. It was love at first sight. It took me a week to convince my husband that we should adopt him. Candy was only half a year younger than Alex. There was a chance that we would have too old dogs and possible high vet bills at the end of their lives. However, once I saw Ingo and Alex playing together in the yard, I knew that my wish would come true.

Top: Coco, 11" x 14", Bottom: Frankie, 12" x 12"

 

 

After I painted Jessie, I worked on portraits of my sister’s dog Coco and of Frankie.

At the beginning of September, I started again with life drawing classes and a painting course with Patricia Savoie. A couple of months later, I was excited to see one of my paintings together with my teacher’s artwork in the November Awards Show of the Ottawa Arts Association at the Ottawa Little Theatre.

Aside from creating pet portraits, I still kept learning different painting styles. In November, I took part in the “Naked in the Landscape” workshop at the National Gallery. I created art inspired by Edwin Holgate.

I ended the year with work on a painting of my in-law’s dachshunds Trixie and Wedel. With every successful artwork, my confidence increased. Please join me again in two weeks, when I will tell you about my creative endeavours of 2007.

The New Family Member – Everlasting Love

The Bone, 16" x 20", acrylic

Blog 47

I ended the old year and started the new year 1996 with a bad cold. I was so sick that I slept most of the time. However, whenever I was awake, I felt very alone and homesick. I lived in new house in a new country far away from my family, and friends. I did not know anyone in the neighbourhood as everyone seemed to hibernate during the cold winter. I felt shy about speaking English, and was not allowed to work as I was still waiting to become a landed immigrant. Ingo looked after me as much as he could but he worked downtown during the week, so I spent a lot of time by myself.

On the first Friday in January, Ingo and I went out to the outskirts of Montreal to “just look” at some Golden Retriever puppies. I don't remember when we started to think about getting a puppy. It must have been quite a sudden decision as I have not found any mentioning in my diary. I do remember, however, that we talked to the Humane Society to find out what dog would be the best for us as I suffered from severe animal phobia. This anxiety was so bad that I did not want to leave our house because there were many dogs in the neighbourhood. I was so afraid of dogs that the smallest dog would be enough to cause a panic attack. We were advised to get a puppy so that I could get used to a slowly growing dog.

However, before we left, I had already bought a light blue blanket, a small green collar, and a leash. It was a very cold night. We went before supper because Ingo thought we would only need less than 2 hours to get to the breeder. As it turned out we had quite some problems to find the place. We were driving in circles in the darkness. At one point, Ingo went to a gas station and bought some chocolate bars for us. I will never forget how solidly frozen they were.

At the breeder's, the puppies were in a big playpen. Suddenly the puppies parents came in the room: two beautiful Goldens. I was too scared to take a good look at them. However, the small puppies were so cute. The breeder who knew about my fear of dogs, just placed the little one named Penny in my arm. Do I even have to mention that we took her with us the same evening? She was so warm and soft. I held her in my arms in the huge blue blanket the whole way home. I still remember how excited I was to have my first puppy.

We renamed her Jessie because we did not like the name Penny. She was very good the first night at our house. She probably was in shock – away from her mother and siblings with those two strange people in a big house.

The big surprise came the next morning when we went to the kitchen. There were little puddles everywhere – not that this was a surprise, but what we had not expected were frozen pipes. No water and a puppy who was peeing and pooping everywhere were not a good start into the day.

The next night was a different story: Jessie cried the whole night like a baby. We had decided that we would stay firm, and not let her into our bedroom. However, it was too heart wrenching to listen to. Therefore, we spend a good part of the night rocking her in our arms on the sofa. We were exhausted when we got up, and called the breeder because we were not sure what to do. The purchase of a cage and lots of patience lessened the problem.

Jessie did help me to get over my fear. However, it did not happen overnight. The first couple of weeks, I was totally overwhelmed. It did not help that I had a relapse and felt awful. For the first week, Jessie woke us up every couple of hours, barked almost non-stop when she was not able to see me, and followed me everywhere when possible. I had absolutely no idea how to deal with her. I was still scared despite all the cuteness.

Luckily, she was a very clever girl and loved to please. After less than a week, she was able to follow the command “sit” and got slowly used to her crate. Ingo and I spent a lot of time training her, and she developed into a fantastic dog. The most admired trick was for her to take her own bag of poop to the garbage bins and drop it inside.

Jessie - Forever in my Heart, 11" x 14", acrylic

When Jessie died due to cancer on October 30, 2005, the day after her 10^th birthday, I was heartbroken. I still do not remember how I made it through the first two months. She was basically my first child. I hardly spent a day without her except when I went to see my friends and family in Germany. She was my constant companion while I tried to get settled in a new country far away from my family and friends. She opened my world to so much pleasure and the unconditional love dogs give. She was at my side during many life crises.

Even though we adopted another Golden Retriever, our beautiful Candy, and our energetic Alex, who I also love dearly, she will always be special and never forgotten. It is no wonder that we have many painting of her. To this day, she is my most painted subject.

Despite our new companion, I still had to try to cope with the frigid and long Canadian winter. Please follow me next week, to see what I did and how I succeeded to adjust.