Blog 48
Since we moved to
our new house in Orléans in December, we had hardly met any
neighbours. They seemed to be hibernating. This was not a problem for
Ingo, who went to work during the week, but I felt quite lonely and
homesick.
Adopting a dog, the
Golden Retriever puppy Jessie, was the first step to getting me out
of the house. However, at first I was too scared to walk her by
myself, so I waited for Ingo to come home. I was not afraid that I
could not control Jessie, but rather that we would meet other dogs
that would harm her. Unfortunately, my fear was confirmed when my
in-laws dachshunds came for their first visit and bit not only Jessie
but also myself when I tried to protect her by taking her into my
arms. This incident meant a step back in my recovery from my animal
phobia. I realized that I could not keep Jessie and possibly myself
from harm, and so I relied on Ingo to take the lead.
On the other hand,
Jessie served as a good guinea pig to practice my English without
judging me. She did not care whether I made mistakes or did express
myself stumbling and in simple terms.
However, a dog is
not a replacement for contact with other people. Ingo and I decided
that we should join a fitness centre. I had been a member of a couple
of fitness centres in Germany and was eager to get back to exercise
classes and weight training at the gym, even though I had started
doing exercise with the help of TV fitness programmes almost as soon
as we had settled in Ottawa.
While we were still
looking for the right gym, we headed out for the first time to the
Rideau Canal. If you know the Ottawa winters, you will agree that you
can only survive the long winters if you like winter sports. Skating
on the canal was my first time on skates in more than ten years. I
had only ever skated on an indoor rink. This was a very different
experience, and while we were a little wobbly, we had a lot of fun.
We also went cross country skiing which I had never done before. It
was just wonderful to be able to glide through the winter wonderland.
In mid January 1996,
I also started my first painting class at the Ottawa School of Art. I
had taken oil painting classes in Germany with artist Inge Besgen in
my early twenties but stopped when I started my studies in business
economics. I was excited to pick up the brush again, but also nervous
that I would not understand what the teacher would be talking about.
The first obstacle was that I had no idea what an easel was when the
teacher asked us to pick up an easel and find a good spot to paint
the still life that was set up. While my general vocabulary was quite
good, I was definitely missing all the subject specific vocabulary.
Over the years, this
problem has become a two way problem. To date, there are whole areas
where I do not know the English translations and others where I know
the English vocabulary but not the German equivalent because I was
never confronted with the situations in Germany. Sometimes, it is
also due to the fact that there is not an easy translation, but you
have to paraphrase what a certain expression means. I definitely make
good use of the help the Internet offers to translate certain words
or idioms.
While I was excited
about going to the painting classes, it was also quite frustrating. I
had hardly painted for a couple of years and it showed. I felt just
like an athlete who had stopped training for a long time. The skills
come back faster, but if you do not practice continuously, you get
rusty.
To meet more people,
we also joined the Orleans Newcomers Club, where we participated in a
couple of clubs, from Games Night to Potluck Dinner Night. Most of
the time, we went as a couple but I also joined the Lunch Group. It
was quite difficult to follow, let alone participate in the
conversations, and most of the time I came home with a big headache
from having to concentrate so hard. I felt out of place because I was
not able to articulate myself in the way I could in my native
language. I felt that this was a big obstacle in making deeper
connections.
We also invited our
neighbours for coffee and cake. Well, half a cake to be precise
because Jessie got to the lemon cheesecake first and took a good bite
out of it while we did not pay attention. Luckily, all our neighbours
had animals and a good sense of humour.
At the same time,
the contact to my German friends was very infrequent which left me
quite depressed. Every day, I waited for the mailman. Generally, in
vain. Sometimes, I wished I could just stay in bed but there was
Jessie to look after. Usually I pulled myself together and cleaned
the house, painted, played piano, and practiced Spanish and Turkish.
Luckily, I also had our church wedding to plan. Another endeavour
that was not without complications.
I hope you will
continue to follow me on my journey to the past. Please forward my
blog to your family and friends who might enjoy my story.
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